I've been thinking about what a proper testimony means to me. Mark 8:36 says, "For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?". This verse has some new meaning for me. What shall it profit me if I go out and help others, but my family is left by the wayside. I must first have a good testimony in the eyes of my husband and kids before I can have a good testimony before anyone else. If I go out and try my best to show others the love of God by standing up and telling others my testimony, but if I'm not first showing that love of God to my husband and kids...then what does that profit me or anyone else? How can I possibly have any kind of testimony in the sight of others about God if my family is not seeing me put forth the same amount of effort if not more into showing them the love of God? The answer is...I can't possibly have any kind of good testimony let alone a testimony that will last. I must first make sure that I am being the wife and mother that I am called to be.
And that brings me to my next point. When God says to walk away from something he means for you to walk away from it. Not to close your eyes, turn your head and not look at it, or to cover it up with a blanket; so that it's still there, but your just not dealing with it. I have been guilty of that lately. God told me to walk away from something, and I didn't want to walk away from it totally...so, I just stepped back from it and covered it; so that it was still there but not out front and center. Was there anything really wrong with it...no, not necessarily. But anything that hinders my ability to continue to improve in taking care of my family is something that does not need to be in my life right now. I need to focus more on my family, and anything that is distracting me too much from doing that has to go. This all goes back to first having a good testimony in the sight of my husband and kids before having a testimony before others, and being obedient to what I feel God is wanting me to do.
This also brings me to yet another point...about having the proper or right mindset. Romans 12:2 says, "And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God". I'm sure that you are wondering what does that scripture have to do with having a proper testimony. Well, it has a lot to do with it. Having a proper testimony has to do with every aspect of your life, and not just one area. Our mindset towards things determines our attitude and our outlook on things. The biggest thing is to listen to what God is saying to you, and the more you cultivate your relationship with Him the better you will hear God when he speaks to your heart. I feel as though God has been speaking to me about things that are in my life that are keeping me from fully being able to cultivate the type of mindset that I feel that God wants ME to have. And this is the example that I will give you...I like to watch Investigation Dateline in the afternoon, and I have recently decided that even though I like the show (and there is nothing wrong with this show in and of itself) I just feel as though it is something that God doesn't want me watching right now. So, after a little bit of struggle, I finally listened to the will of God for me in my life, and have stopped watching it. Again, this is for me and my life...I just feel like it's one of the things that God has been laying on my heart to walk away from because for what ever reason it is not helping me to cultivate the type of mindset that I feel that God wants me to be working on having. And this circles right on back around to listening to the will of God in your life...when he says to walk away from something he means it. Don't try to cover it up and hide it...walk away from it.
For me at lest this is all part of the bigger picture of having a proper testimony. Making sure that I am first and foremost listening to the will of God for me in my life so that I can have a good testimony in the eyes of my husband and kids. Because with out that good testimony I cannot have a good or lasting testimony when I stand before others.
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